Learn How Important It Is to Allow Time Before Making Fast Decision after A Loss of a Spouse, or an Elderly Loved One.

Helping an Elderly Loved One Move On after a Loss Is Difficult – Senior Care Considerations near Woodland Hills, CA

When a couple has been married for a long time, their relationship can often evolve into a support system so efficient that even adult children hardly notice when changes occur in their own parents. For example, if Dad’s hearing is poor, Mom becomes his translator. If Mom’s arthritis is bad, Dad lends her his muscles. If one suffers from memory loss, more often than not, the other fills in the gaps so smoothly that it’s barely noticeable to anyone outside the relationship. These are all minor forms of senior care.

That is why issues when one of them passes, the person remaining seems suddenly more frail and needy than anyone would have expected. The surviving spouse is not only suffering the passing of their life partner, a loss from which they may never completely recover, but the person who filled in those gaps is also gone, and those gaps can suddenly look like chasms.

Naturally, the adult children in this situation expect their surviving parent to go through the grief process and require a lot of comfort and care for awhile, but more often than many would expect, that comfort and care evolves into managing long-term care needs.

Adult children often find themselves overwhelmed by the stark reality of the level of needs of their surviving parent. Unfortunately, the funeral of one parent frequently becomes a time for planning for the care of the remaining parent.

The death of a parent is difficult, whether it happens suddenly or was due to a lengthy illness. Either way, unless there is an urgent reason to do otherwise, it’s generally unwise to make changes too quickly, if they can’t easily be undone.

• It’s easy to make rash decisions based on emotions, but you have to look at the big picture and determine the best, long-term solution to avoid having to repeatedly uproot an emotionally and often physically frail elderly parent.
• There’s a lot of emotion tied to the belongings of someone who has passed away and you must give your parent time to grieve for their loss. It’s also an important to allow yourself time to grieve. After some time has passed, you can decide together how to deal with clothing and other personal items of the deceased.
• Don’t become a dictator, remember to protect the dignity of your elder. Ask them about their preferences. Give them choices and don’t push for decisions. Take the slow path and work with compassion if you are pressing for change, even if that change is for their safety.
• Obviously, if the elder is very fragile or has cognitive problems so great that he or she can’t be left alone, immediate arrangements must be made. With time, some of the shock of the loss might fade and you may notice that there is still a lot of fight left in the surviving spouse.
• Make decisions that need to be made, but if at all possible, allow your remaining parent to adjust to these changes as slowly as possible. Home care services can play an invaluable role in helping your entire family through this difficult time.

There’s no one answer to the question of when the time is right for in-home care.

However, if you consider the points raise here today, you’ll have a better idea of when it’s time for in-home care.

And, if you have any follow-up questions, please contact us (310) 400-6869…we are always here to assist…You are Important to Us!

We pride ourselves in the Best In-Home Care!

Caregiving for You, Inc.